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Catholic Squirrels
There were three country churches in a small Texas town: the Presbyterian
church, the Methodist church and the Catholic church. Each church was overrun
with pesky squirrels.
One day, the Presbyterian Church called a meeting to decide what to do about the
squirrels. After much prayer and consideration they determined that the
squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with God's
divine will.
The Methodist group got together and decided that they were not in a position to
harm any of God's creations. So, they humanely trapped the squirrels and set
them free a few miles outside of town. Three days later, the squirrels were
back.
It was only the Catholics who were able to come up with the best and most
effective solution. They baptized the squirrels and registered them as members
of the church. Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.
One Sunday morning an old cowboy entered a church just before services were to
begin. Although the old man and his clothes were spotlessly clean, he wore
jeans, a denim shirt and boots that were very worn and ragged. In his hand he
carried a worn out old hat and an equally worn out bible. The church he entered
was in a very upscale and exclusive part of the city. It was the largest and
most beautiful church the old cowboy had ever seen. The people of the
congregation were all dressed with expensive clothes and accessories. As the
cowboy took a seat, the others moved away from him. No one greeted, spoke to, or
welcomed him. They were all appalled at his appearance and did not attempt to
hide it.
The preacher gave a long sermon about Hellfire and brimstone and a stern lecture
on how much money the church needed to do God's work. As the old cowboy was
leaving the church, the preacher approached him and asked the cowboy to do him a
favor. "Before you come back in here again, have a talk with God and ask him
what He thinks would be appropriate attire for worship."
The old cowboy assured the preacher he would.
The next Sunday, he showed back up for the services wearing the same ragged
jeans, shirt, boots, and hat. Once again he was completely shunned and ignored.
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